Invasion of the Mind Swappers From Asteroid 6! Page 3
Delilah sprang into action.
Scampering up the stairs, she rushed through the legs of the space creatures, who responded by saying things like, “Oogoo,” and “Mageeha,” and “Watch where you’re going!”
What was she up to? Howie wondered. He had a pretty good idea, but he kept it to himself so that Delilah could be the hero of the story.
The crowd below watched intently as this seemingly ordinary squirrel ran from space creature to space creature, holding something up in its paw. What was it? Howie strained to see.
Then he made it out. Yes, he thought so: It was an acorn!
Suddenly, one of the aliens bent down and grabbed the acorn from Delilah’s paw. “Eek, eek!” it squeaked as it shoved the acorn into its greedy mouth.
But this was not space-talk. This was squirrel-talk! Delilah had found the creature that held the squirrel’s brain.
Now that she had found him, she skittered up his leg until she reached his shoulders. There, she gazed intently into his eyes. (All four of them.)
A blue light began to glow in the middle of the space creature’s forehead. It glowed deeper and deeper in color until all at once it shot out in an arc to Delilah’s forehead. No sooner had it reached the squirrel than it faded away.
The squirrel, looking bewildered, scrambled down the creature’s body, off the platform, and down the stairs, until it reached the safety of a tree. Up it went into the high branches.
“Delilah!” Howie called out. “Where are you going?”
“I’m not going anywhere,” the space creature who had just eaten the acorn replied. “I’m right here!”
CHAPTER 9:
“DROOL FOR YOUR LIFE!”
Delilah (the space creature) scooped Delilah (the dog, but with the space creature’s mind) up in her arms and held her out in front of her. “Look at me!” she commanded.
The dog turned its head this way and that so rapidly Howie was afraid it might get whiplash.
“Look into my eyes!” Delilah commanded again.
“No, no!” the dog replied.
“If you don’t, I will see that you live the rest of your days in the body of this dog. You will have to eat from a bowl on the floor forever, and little girls will put bows in your hair and call you their baby!”
The dog stopped its thrashing at once.
Staring into the eyes of the space creature, it made a blue circle appear in the middle of its forehead. A ray of light shot from one forehead to the other.
Suddenly, the Mind Swapper dropped the dog to the ground. She scampered down the steps and ran toward Howie.
“I’m free, I’m free!” Delilah yipped. “But now I must save the others.”
“But how?” Howie asked, knowing perfectly well he could figure it out if he were the hero of the story.
“It’s simple, really,” Delilah said. “You see, once the Mind Swapper realized that—”
“Don’t you mean the Mind Swapper from Asteroid 6!™?” Howie asked.
“Right,” said Delilah. “Well, anyway, once it realized that staying inside my body meant living like a dog, it wanted out! All we have to do is convince the other Mind Swappers—uh, Mind Swappers from Asteroid 6!™—that they wouldn’t want to be stuck inside the bodies of earthlings, either, and they’ll swap their minds back, too!”
“Easier said than done,” the philosophical Howie replied.
“Yes, but where there’s a will, there’s a way,” the equally philosophical Delilah replied back.
Just then, Toby ran over to the two dogs. “Howie! Delilah!” he shouted. “What’s going on? Delilah, why were you in that flying saucer?”
“No time to explain,” Delilah yipped as she leaped up at Toby and began licking his face.
“What are you doing, you silly mutt?” Toby cried. “Stop, stop!”
As Toby tried to bat Delilah away, Delilah called over her shoulder to Howie, “Run over to somebody and start slobbering on them!”
“What?”
“Do what I’m telling you!” Delilah ordered. “Drool, drool for your life!”
Howie, sensing the brilliance behind Delilah’s plan, worked up some saliva and chose one of the college students as his victim.
“Iggo ucko pooey!” the college student said in Asteroid Sixian.
Roughly translated, she was saying, “This is disgusting, and if you think I’m going to stick around on this planet and be covered in slime by some hyperactive creature who, may I point out, also sheds, you’ve got another think coming!”
A circle of blue light appeared in the middle of her forehead. Howie stopped his slobbering long enough to watch as the arc of light went out from her forehead and reached the forehead of one of the Mind Swappers on the deck of the Mother Ship.
Suddenly, the girl’s eyes snapped shut, then open, and she said, “Oh, thank goodness, I’m me at last! I’m free at last! And all because of one very smart dog and one slobbery one!”
Howie tried not to be insulted.
The next thing he knew, each and every forehead in the crowd began to glow with a blue light. Pretty soon, all the Mind Swappers from Asteroid 6!™ were back on the Mother Ship and all the citizens of Centerville were back to normal.
And all because of Delilah!
(And Howie too, but mostly because of Delilah.)
Just before the Mother Ship took off to return to whence from which it came, the leader of the Invasion of the Mind Swappers from Asteroid 6!™ stepped forward and spoke.
(No one knew how it was that these creatures sometimes knew English. It is one of the great mysteries of the universe.)
“We leave in peace!” the Mind Swapper proclaimed. “Okay, I admit we didn’t come in peace, but we’re leaving in peace, so that’s what counts, right? We intended to take over Planet Earth because we didn’t have enough room on our asteroid. It’s pretty small, and the way our population keeps growing, the rents are killing us. But on Asteroid 6, we do not have to endure the saliva of lowly creatures. This would be too much for us to take. It is gross and unsanitary and, on top of that, it tickles.
“We apologize for any inconvenience our stay here may have caused you. When I snap my fingers, you will forget this ever happened. Have a nice day.”
With that, the Mother Ship vanished into thin air, and all the citizens of Centerville awoke as if from a dream.
“Want to play Rip-the-Rag?” Delilah asked Howie.
“Great,” Howie replied. “Then can we play Knock-Each-Other-Down? “
They played games all afternoon and never remembered a thing that had happened that terrible day.
(Although they couldn’t help but feel it had something to do with Delilah’s sudden and enduring fondness for acorns.)
THE END
HOWIE’S WRITING JOURNAL
Uncle Harold said my story is ready to be sent to his editor! I’m going to be famous!
I wonder if it will change me. Will I have to wear sunglasses all the time? I don’t think I’d like that. I bump into things too much as it is. But maybe I can get a Jacuzzi!
I asked Uncle Harold about it.
He said, “I’ve written many books and I don’t wear sunglasses and I don’t have a Jacuzzi.”
I found this discouraging. “Then why write?” I asked.
“Keep writing,” he advised me. “You’ll II find out.”
I think Uncle Harold has been listening to too many of Mr. Monroe’s Zen meditation tapes. What kind of answer is that?
Maybe I’ll just have to keep writing. Besides, Delilah says I still have a ways to go in knowing how to write girl characters. So I’d better get started on my next book.
But first I’m going to take a nap. Maybe I’ll dream about being famous.
And having a Jacuzzi.
What’s next from Howie’s overactive imagination? Here’s a sample from
Howie Monroe and the Doghouse of Doom
HOWIE’S WRITING JOURNAL
Last night, Pete got int
o trouble with Mr. and Mrs. Monroe. He was supposed to write a story for school, but he didn’t, and now he’s getting an eff. I don’t know what that is, but it must be bad, because Mr. Monroe said, “I can’t believe my son - the son of an English professor - got an eff on a writing assignment!”
Pete Said, “How was I supposed to write a Story when I didn’t have an idea?
I wonder if it’s like a stain. I remember the time I got into trouble for drooling on something Mr. Monroe had written. It left a stain, but it wasn’t my fault. I was just happy to see him.
Pete and I don’t usually agree about things. Maybe that’s because he’s an eleven-year-old boy and I’m a poppy, but I think it’s mostly because we don’t look at things the same way. This time, though I had to agree with him I know what it’s like trying to write when you don’t have an idea.
Like now. I’m supposed to be writing a third book in my series, Tales from the House of Bunnicula, and I used up all my ideas on my first two.
I asked Uncle Harold what to do. Uncle Harold wrote all those books about our rabbit, Bunnicula, so he knows a thing or two about writing.
He said, “Well, Howie, the big question a Writer has to ask himself is -”
“When do I get paid?”
“That wasn’t what I was going to say.”
“When do I get my picture on the cover of Canine Quarterly?”
“Howie,” Uncle Harold said, giving me that look he gets sometimes when he thinks I’m not taking life seriously. Personally, I don’t think life should be taken seriously. Except maybe when your food dish is empty, or you really, really, really need to go out and everybody’s saying, “It’s your turn to walk the dog!”
Anyway, what he told me is that the big Question writers ask is, “What if?” which I guess I knew already.
“You have to put yourself in the place of others, Howie,” he went on. “Ask how You’d feel if what happened to someone else happened to you. or if you could do something impossible. Like fly.”
“Or stay awake for more then two hours in a row?”
“Exactly.”
I don’t think a book about staying awake for two hours and fifteen minutes will sell many copies. I’d better ask a different “What if.”
What if . . . what if . . . what if . . .
What if I were like that kid in the book Toby’s been reading to Uncle Harold and me every night? That kid has a pretty interesting life, His parents have died, see, and he lives with these really mean relatives, but then he discovers he’s got special powers, and when he goes off to a school to learn how to use them, he finds out he’s famous and . . .
That’s it! I know just what I’m going to write!
Hey, that “What if” comes in pretty handy.
Maybe if Pete had used it, he wouldn’t have gotten an eff.
Howie Monroe and the Doghouse of Doom
By Howie Monroe
CHAPTER 1:
“THE IMPORTANT LETTER”
Howie Monroe was as smart as a whip and as cute as a button, but that didn’t stop him from being an orphan. He lived with his mean aunt and uncle, Mr. and Mrs. Monroe, and their wretched, runny-nosed sons, Toby and Pete.
(NOTE to the real Monroes: This is only a story! You are not mean, wretched, or runny-nosed.) (Except maybe for Pete.) (Sometimes.)
The Monroes made Howie sleep under Pete’s bed, which was a dark and scary place, full of all kinds of creepy stuff, including several generations of dust bunnies. (See Book 1: It Came from Beneath the Bed! by Howie Monroe.) They were so mean to him, they fed him every other day and even then, were so stingy, they gave him only Kibbles or Bits.
Howie Monroe dreamed of a better life where he would not be called “dumb dog” all the time and everyone would recognize how special he was.
How, do you ask, did he know he was special? He knew because when he noticed his face reflected in his water dish, he saw that he was as cute as a button; when he did the crossword puzzle in his mind while sleeping under the single sheet of newspaper that was sometimes provided for warmth on cold winter nights, he knew he was as smart as a whip; and, besides, he had a mysterious pain in his back left leg that he was sure was a mark of his being an unusual dog with special powers.
One day, he got a letter in the mail. It was a good thing that none of the Monroes were home. Otherwise, Pete and Toby would have folded it into a paper airplane and flown it over his head while he yipped and chased after it. This time, he ran quickly to read it under Pete’s bed, and what a lucky thing he did because it was a letter that would change his life forever!
Dear Resident, it began promisingly, You, too, could be a dog wizard! Take this simple test to find out!
1. Do you live with cruel relatives who make you sleep in a dark and scary place?
Howie looked around at the cobwebs and dust bunnies. Check!
2. Do you have an unusual physical characteristic that has great significance that won’t be revealed to you until an important point in the story?
Howie thought of the bursitis in his back left leg. Check!
3. Do you have a spirit of adventure, a sharp mind, and ten bucks to return with the enclosed application to the Dogwiz Academy for Canine Conjurers?
Howie glanced at the crumpled ten-dollar bill lying under a heap of Pete’s smelly, dirty socks. Check!
Yes! He was going to the Dogwiz Academy for Canine Conjurers! He, Howie Monroe, cute, adorable, but pitiful enough to make the reader feel sorry for him, was going to find out how special he really was!
He might even get to eat Kibbles and Bits!
JAMES HOWE never thought he would Write for a living, since writing was too much fun to be considered a job. Many books and awards later, his story has turned out to be slightly different from what he expected. Mr. Howe is the author of the beloved Bunnicula books and the Pinky and Rex series. He has also written Morgan’s Zoo, A Night Without Stars, Stage Fright, and There’s a Dragon in My Sleeping Bag. Mr. Howe lives in New York State.
Tales from the House of Bunnicula Books by James Howe:
It Came from Beneath the Bed!
Invasion of the Mind Swappers from Asteriod 6!
Howie Monroe and the Doghouse of Doom
Screaming Mummies of the Pharaoh’s Tomb II
Bud Barkin, Private Eye
The Odorous Adventures of Stinky Dog
Other Bunnicula Books by James Howe:
Bunnicula (with Deborah Howe)
Howliday Inn
The Celery Stalks at Midnight
Nighty-Nightmare
Return to Howliday Inn
Bunnicula Strikes Again!
Bunnicula’s Pleasantly Perplexing Puzzles
Bunnicula’s Long-Lasting-Laugh-Alouds
Bunnicula’s Frightfully Fabulous Factoids
Bunnicula’s Wickedly Wacky Word Games
This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real locales are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
First Aladdin Paperbacks edition June 2003
Text copyright © 2002 by James Howe
Illustrations copyright © 2002 by Brett Helquist
Atheneum Books for Young Readers
An imprint of Simon & Schuster
Children’s Publishing Division
1230 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY 10020
www.SimonandSchuster.com
All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form.
Also available in an Atheneum Books for Young Readers hardcover edition.
Designed by Ann Bobco
The illustrations were rendered in acrylics and oils.
The Library of Congress has cataloged the hardcover edition as follows:
Howe, James, 1946–
Invasion
of the mind swappers from asteroid 6! / by James Howe
p. cm.—(Tales from the House of Bunnicula ; 2)
Summary: In his new book, Howie the wirehaired dachshund writes all about how the Mind Swappers from Asteroid 6 invade Earth and how he and his friend Delilah save the day.
[1. Authorship—Fiction. 2. Extraterrestrial beings—Fiction. 3. Dogs—Fiction. 4. Humorous stories.] I. Helquist, Brett, ill. II. Title.
PZ7.H83727 In 2002
[Fic]—dc21 2001045816
ISBN 978-1-4424-8733-8(pbk.)
ISBN 978-1-4424-8733-8 (eBook)